Smell ya later!

I hate Mondays at the gym. There were no machines available except for one stair climber. Stair climbing is really friendly on my feet and it helps me stay in my target heart rate zone better because I'm working large muscle groups in my legs. The reason why I detest it is because there's this guy who likes to show off. He puts the machine on the highest level and it looks like he's working really hard, but he's actually holding himself up on the side rails so his arms are getting the workout. If you look closely, he's just plain cheating.

A boy came up next to me and he started to sweat. Suddenly, I noticed a foul odor that reminded me of vinegar. It was really rank. I couldn't tell if it was him or me, so I started to sniff myself in various places. Nope, no smell from me. I was fresh and pure like my virginity. Then my trainer friend came up to me and we started to talk. I said out loud how someone's smell was making me sick and we both got a good laugh. I think the boy next to me got offended because he stopped his machine and walked away. A few minutes later, I noticed that the sweat from my sweatband was dripping down my ear so I adjusted it. That's when I noticed the smell. IT WAS ME! My sweatband was generating that foul vinegar odor.

Horrified by my rude behavior (and the stink from my sweatband), I went out in search of the boy that I offended. I saw him talking to a friend of mine, so I went over to apologzie. After explaining the whole thing, he got a big laugh out of it. We introduced ourselves and proceeded to shake hands, because us gay boys like to pretend that we're butch when we're at the gym. He realized he was wearing gloves, so he took them off before shaking my hand. Suddenly, a familiar scent filled my nostrils. Well it didn't fill them, it kind of INVADED my nostrils. It was a stink so potent that scientists use it for biological warfare research. That nasty vinegar smell was coming from his gloves! He was wearing them while he was on the stair climber! I politely smiled and walked to the sink to wash my hands.

I know what you're thinking. You're probably saying: "Richie, maybe it WAS your sweatband that made the smell and it was just a coincidence that his gloves smelled too." Actually, my sweatband had a muted and surreptitious smell. His gloves had the BAM! smell to them and that's what I smelled when I was stepping. So there.

The moral of this story? Never doubt your freshness.