Let's all go to the lobby!

I saw Rent last Wednesday with a friend of mine and it was fan bloody tastic! I had to fight the urge to mouth the words during the movie. The theatre employees at River East STILL don't know how to ring up free passes. I go there like once a month and they're like: "You caint use deez on special engagements" and I'm like "Um, yes I can." Then I show them how to do it and they call for a manager and the manager tells them exactly what I just told them and when the manager goes away I look at the employee with a raised eyebrow. At that point, I snap my fingers, roll my head, and flip my imaginary long hair as I walk away with my tickets. It happens so often that I can just turn it on and off like a switch. One minute I'm Rock Hudson in Pillow Talk and the next minute I'm Halle Berry in B.A.P.S..

My girl Joy was there managing the theatre so I felt comfortable. I waved hello to her, but she was not in a good mood. They were huddled around the escalator with security and I thought someone fell. It turns out that a woman got her coat stuck on the bottom of the escalator. What a dumbass. That theatre is so state-of-the-art in the sense that all the areas are climate-controlled to a normal person's satisfaction. You don't need a coat there. We looked at the woman and her imitation leather coat that matched her fucking ugly Himilayan sheepskin sherpa boots that every woman is wearing now that Oprah named it one of her favorite things and we laughed as we ascended to the third floor of the theatre.

When two gay boys go to the movies, no one is safe. We comment on people waiting in the concession line, we cruise the 17 year old boys who sweep the hallways, we laugh hysterically at any preview with Tara Reid, and we throw our jujyfruits at anyone who talks during the movie.