I just claled to say I lnve yot

I was walking back to the office from my lunch break yesterday and I saw this guy who I dated briefly back in January. He was driving, and he almost went into the other lane. I felt like a true geisha when I realized that I was able to stop a man in his tracks with a single look.

He got mad at me in January because I was playing darts with another guy and he drunk text messaged me from across the room. I was trying to do my dart hustler routine and he totally ruined it with his constant glowering. The last message I got from him was DONT CLAL ME EVVER AGIN. I've never claled anyone and I don't think I ever will. I assume he meant to tell me never to call him again, so I didn't.

Drunk text messaging is quickly replacing drunk calling, an incredibly annoying disturbance that usually takes place at an ungodly hour. The caller tells his or her victim how much they love them or how good of a time he or she is having. In a recent survey I conducted, nine of the fifteen people I asked have told me that they'd received a drunk text message in the last six months. They're usually misspelled and make absolutely no sense. Six of the nine messages were sent between the hours of 2 A.M. and 4 A.M..

I think it's a step in the right direction. The drunk person would have had to be dexterous enough to hit the keys to spell the words and to even find a person's name in their directory to begin with. Drunk calling just requires a push of a button or a simple voice command. So the next time you get a drunk text from someone, don't get mad. Be happy that the mere thought of you was a shining beacon in a sea of tequila in that person's warped mind.