Word Play

My life is governed by simple rules to help me live better and to avoid looking stupid at all costs. One of these rules is to never use a word if I don't know the definition. One of my college professors always told me to look up every word I don't know and every word that I think I know. Constant nagging, or sage advice? I'm starting to wish that everyone else on earth would attend his lectures, because a lot of people are pissing me off with their word usage.

I was waiting in line at Subway and a woman was talking about Iran, or as she pronounced it (EYE RAN). She was telling her friend about how everyone is forgetting about their nuclear program and that the media needs to report more about the goings-on in Iran. She went on about how it's not safe that a country has nuclear capabilities, and that the threat of nuclear power is something that we should be concerned about. Nuclear, nuclear, nuclear.

Then I turned to her and asked what 'nuclear' meant, and she said: "It's when they bomb other countries."

I guess I should have been happy with her stupid answer. It could have been a lot worse. She could have SPELLED nuclear, thinking that this was a spelling bee.