My Latchkey Education

I learned a hell of a lot watching Sesame Street and game shows when I was a kid. A lot of people laugh when I tell them that, but it's actually very logical if you take a moment to think about it.

We all watched Sesame Street as kids. Don't deny it. It taught kids some very important things without playing down to them. Captain Vegetable got us started on healthy eating... then Cookie Monster came along and fucked everything up with the cookie binging. Grover paved the way for future neurotics and Oscar the Grouch made being a meanie the coolest thing ever. I still get chills when I think of Ernie and Bert in the Egyptian pyramid! I really hope that the episodes make it to DVD because I'd like my children to get the same 'latchkey education' as I did.

After Sesame Street, I watched The Price is Right. According to my grandmother, my first words were "on down." We watched TPIR so much that the sound of Rod Roddy's voice allowed my own voice to form words. I couldn't say 'come' then, but I certainly can now! ::wink:: The Price is Right featured products you'd find in a grocery store such as Rice a Roni and Sue Bee honey. There was one game in particular called "Then and Now," where you had to guess if the price of a product was the price from now or 5-10 years ago. It was only four years old and I scoffed at how much the price of Ben Gay had gone up in ten years. Now that's America!

So the next time you sit your children in front of a television, take a moment to consider how much they'd learn from Big Bird and Bob Barker. In a future blog, I'll explain how watching soap operas at an early age will help you become more witty on the playground.