Sticky Rice

I saw a Filipino woman at the bank this week and she had her baby in a stroller with her. I guess I still look ethnic even with a hat and scarf, because she instantly recognized my heritage. "Are you pilipino?" I hesitated with a 'if I say yes, does it mean we have to be friends?' look, then I told her yes. I soon regretted my weekly act of niceness because she wouldn't stop talking. She started talking to me in one of the many languages spoken in the Philippines, but I just stared at her like she was insane.

Fortunately, her baby started screaming so I was free. Then she started singing a lullaby about waiting in line at the bank and how he was a good boy. Leave it to Filipinos to turn anything into a lullaby. I remember when my mother used to sing this really lame song to my brother when he was a baby:

"I have two hands... the left and the right. I have two feet, the left and the right..."

It stated the obvious, it didn't rhyme, and it had no animals in it. What the fuck kind of kid song is that supposed to be anyway?

I think Filipinos are the only people who think that every Filipino is automatically their friend and confidant, strangers included. Ever see two Irish men at the bank embrace their heritage? I didn't think so. I wonder if people will be doing that in the future when we've coexisted with aliens. "Excuse me, are you a human? ME TOO! Let's have lunch!"