All About the Bear... or Under Cub Bear Blues... or Dry Bear's Ed

As I was coming into work this morning, I saw that someone had thrown away a stuffed dog and it was on the floor in front of the dumpsters. It was old and worn out, and I'm sure it provided many years of comfort to someone. I laughed a little because I thought of the Simpsons episode with Mister Burns and his Bobo, then Smithers in his Bobo costume. I had a stuffed bear when I was a kid.

I was six years old and I got him for Christmas. I named him Courtney, after a boy in my class with whom I had a fond relationship. Courtney Bear went everywhere with me and he was my best friend. He smelled like soy sauce because he was on the kitchen counter when I accidentally spilled a bottle of soy sauce when I was in the cabinets trying to get cookies. You can imagine how I get a little misty-eyed whenever I'm in a sushi restaurant.

When I was ten years old, I started making fun clothes for Courtney and that's when my mother got alarmed. She thought it was cute at first, but she freaked when we had matching outfits. One day I woke up and Courtney was gone. I searched frantically, but I never found him. Later when I was in high school, my mother confessed to throwing him away because she thought he was making me weird. She also complained that he had a bad smell, but that was only the soy sauce. I wouldn't let her launder him because I was afraid he'd drown. I never really forgave my mother for throwing away one of my best friends.

Anyone who has owned a stuffed animal understands the connection and the importance. Psychologists call it a 'transitional object,' but I hate it when they do that. When you think about it, a cherished stuffed animal is something that you love and it won't ever talk back to you or tell you anything that you don't want to hear (partly because it can't talk at all). And isn't it cute to go to a guy's place and to see his favorite stuffed toy on his bed or on his night stand? Yeah it can be creepy if he clings to it, but it looks cute from far away. It's also a great way to get the guy to do whatever you want. "You're gonna cuddle with me or the bear gets it!" ::letter opener positioned over the poor bear::