In America, talk is CHEAP!

I hate when people give unwanted advice. Whenever I see someone I know, I'll engage in the usual banter and they'll ask how I'm doing. If my response doesn't contain at least five synonyms for the word 'fantastic,' then people automatically assume that I'm suicidal. The phrase "things are fine" just doesn't seem to cut it anymore. I love it when I tell them that things are ok with me and they put their hand on my shoulder like I just found out there was no Santa Claus. Then comes the unwanted advice: you know what you need? (insert mindless blather here)

I wish we could just do away with language for a day and see how people interact. I think people will learn a lot more about each other if they were forced to read a person just by their facial expression or body language. It's much more intimate, and a little sexy in my opinion. I have some of the best moments with people just sitting in the same room with them, giving them coy smiles and the occasional raised eyebrow. A fun example is when you're out with a friend and you both see someone acting really stupid or wearing something hideous. You look at the funny thing, you look at each other, you look back at the funny thing, and you both burst into laughter simultaneously. That's when you know you're on the same wavelength as someone else. Just don't get too chummy with someone like that or you'll get on the same menstrual cycle.