Gamer's Fury

Last night I was playing Final Fantasy 12. In case you don't already know, I'm one of those gay nerds. Not a hot gay nerd, mind you! I'm at the end of the game, but I decided to track down an especially tough side quest monster known as Fafnir. Can I get a w00t from my fellow nerds out there? Anyway, I got my ass handed to me by this tough monster who can kill with about two hits. My party died because I wasn't prepared. I was so mad that I yelled "FUCK" really loudly and threw the controller at the playstation. Then I turned off the tv and sulked for the rest of the evening.

This rather interesting display of childish behavior is known as "Game Fury." It's like road rage, but for gamers. A frustrated gamer will often curse at the screen and throw objects like I did, but I've also seen a fist fight break out between two brothers playing Street Fighter.

One of the best incidents I've seen happened after a winterguard rehearsal. We all went back to the team captain's house and he started to play Super Mario 64. During the part where you have to maneuver Mario through rings in the sky, Captain couldn't quite get the hang of using Mario's flying cap. He fell into the water so many times that he got up and yanked the controller out of the system, but not before yelling at it: "You're such a cheater! I HATE YOU!" Then he stormed into his room and slammed the door.

The bubbly young girl in our group took it upon herself to comment on Captain's strange behavior by saying the four most dangerous words in the gaming world, "it's just a game." As if on cue, Captain swung his door open (gamers have supersonic hearing) and yelled at the girl to get out of his apartment. The rest of us knew better than to piss off a gay gamer. They'll scratch your eyes out without ruining their manicure.

If there was ever a group of people in society that you had to choose to be nice to, you should always consider the video gamer. If the news headlines about PS3 waiting line shootouts won't sway you, consider the fact that pretty much ever nerd has played Quake and knows how to use a nail gun. Don't give attitude to your waiter because he's probably played Microsoft Flight Simulator and will ultimately shoot at you from a crop duster as you walk back to your car. You'd be looking at it and thinking 'there ain't no crops here!' Ever see North By Northwest?