Objection!

Ever since I was a kid, I've been notoriously impatient. I would always unwrap my Christmas gifts and re-wrap them before my mother got home from work. Riding home in the car with all of the groceries in the back seat, I'd climb over to the bag with the cereal and tear it open in search of the toy at the bottom of the box.

Nothing has really changed now that I'm an adult. I look at spoilers for my favorite television shows because I hate waiting for the actual show to premiere. Whenever I have a man over, I immediately begin undoing his pants (who wastes time with small talk anymore?). So when I found out that there would be another chapter in my favorite video game series, I simply had to have it.

Rather than waiting until the end of October for the U.S. release, I took it upon myself to get my hands on an advance copy of Phoenix Wright: Trials and Tribulations, or Gayakuten Saiban 3 as it's known in Japan, from a reputable dealer overseas.

For those of you who aren't familiar, Phoenix Wright is a popular "lawyer novella" series on the Nintendo DS. You review evidence, cross examine witnesses, and raise objections when you find contradictions in a witness' testimony. I love being able to shout "OBJECTION!" into the built-in microphone.

Technology has allowed us to quickly communicate worldwide and bypass months of waiting like the suckers who don't have Phoenix Wright 3 have to do. What now? I guess that the only way to take my impatience to a higher level is to find out when and how exactly I'm fated to die. If you can put me in touch with an awesome psychic, I'd be eternally grateful!