I want to be a carney

When I was young, I dreamed of joining the circus. It was the perfect dream. I'd be surrounded by people who wouldn't judge me for being different, I'd get to travel, and I could ride the elephants whenever I felt like it.

Speaking of freaks, I thought about my ex boyfriend today. I was emptying my voicemail at work and I came across one of his lame-ass messages: "Hey babe, what are you doing? I'm at work and I just woke up from my nap. Call me."

How fuckin sheisty is that? Who sleeps at work? Wait I know, HE does. That's what you get when you're coming down off of the drugs you did over the weekend. Drugs are bad.